Let me preface this by saying I saw Jurassic World in perhaps the worst theater I\u2019ve ever been in because all my friends bailed on me, and by the time they did, all the tickets were sold out for the only time of the day I had available, so I had to buy the tickets at a theater I never go to.\u00a0 The 3D screen was terrible because I could see 30% of the second eye on the left side of the screen.\u00a0 And there was no surround sound.\u00a0 The only audio was from within the screen, which wasn\u2019t even loud enough to startle me awake if I were falling asleep (I didn\u2019t).\u00a0 Plus I got in 6 minutes late, so I probably missed some exposition about where they were.\u00a0 But I put it together that they were on one of the original islands, if not the original.\u00a0 I do not believe the theater experience negatively affected my opinion of the story, but since I missed out on some exposition, and the surround sound experience, I feel like I didn\u2019t get fully into any moment.<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s my general feeling about the movie:<\/p>\n
If you go into the movie expecting to ignore the main adult leads (you know, the way we pretend Orlando Bloom wasn\u2019t in Pirates of the Caribbean, or that Giles was never in Broken Arrow), and avoid comparison to Spielberg or John Williams, it\u2019s a very entertaining blockbuster movie which would stand on its own merit if the others didn\u2019t exist.<\/p>\n
I thought it was fun and gave lots of good allusions to the first.\u00a0 However, it was frustrating that IT WAS THE SAME DAMN PLOT, on crack.\u00a0 Only this time, there were more guests, AND they were aware of the mistakes that were previously made.\u00a0 Even so, they go ahead and create a new dinosaur, named Indomitus Rex — because four year olds would have trouble saying \u201cIndomitable Rex\u201d.\u00a0 Oh, I\u2019m sorry, she used another name \u2026 \u201cArcheoencephalcochus\u201d or something.\u00a0\u00a0 So obviously, it breaks loose, and they make bad decision after bad decision\u2026 you kind of Hammond\u2019s nephew in Jurassic Park 2, or the screenwriter of Jurassic Park 3.<\/p>\n
I enjoyed it a lot for the imaginative dinosaur scenes.\u00a0 And the new Indomitus Rex is loaded with really neat monster abilities!<\/p>\n
What frustrated me were some early plot-holes, and the main characters\u2019 inability to feel any emotion from joy to fear, sorrow, or aggression.\u00a0 The two adult leads were a beautiful blonde in white wearing high heels, and a gruff velociraptor trainer who carries himself like a boy scout but responds to actions instead of taking charge.\u00a0 The female lead is a perfectionist and a bitch about it who pawned her nephews off on some assistant (a nanny) she hired for that one day and had never met before.\u00a0 The two have this weird relationship where he tries to break her callous shell.\u00a0 But he wasn\u2019t nearly charming enough for that.<\/p>\n
So the movie goes through the motions, through neat little scenes with predictable outcomes (the dinosaur always wins) until its logical conclusion, which actually, I really appreciated.\u00a0 The ending was surprisingly similar to the original Jurassic Park ending (hats off to ya!) with enough twists on it to keep it fresh.<\/p>\n
Beyond plot, aesthetically, the thing I think was lacking most . . . was a good score.<\/p>\n
There was no identifiable theme for any of the dinosaurs or characters.\u00a0 There may have been one theme I liked and recognized twice, but I didn\u2019t associate it with any character of moment in the movie.\u00a0 The Jurassic Park theme came back once, when the boys stumbled across a hut with Jurassic Park merchandizing and equipment.\u00a0 It was the piano cue which shot me back to the moment in the first movie when Hammond and Ellie are talking about the Flea Circus over ice cream.\u00a0 At some point before or after that scene, the Jurassic Park piano theme played as it panned over the merchandise that would never be sold.\u00a0 Maybe it was actually at the very end of the movie. Anyways, the old music in this scene in the new movie was so immediately powerful, that I realized I hadn\u2019t recognized the music at all before or after that scene.<\/p>\n
The other thing I noticed immediately, that I got over pretty quickly, but wanted again from time to time, was lack of Spielberg\u2019s cinematic style.\u00a0 This movie felt like a mix between epic helicopter shots and coverage.\u00a0 Spielberg doesn\u2019t do coverage for a talking scene.\u00a0 The characters are moving or directing the camera to follow some motion.\u00a0 The camera is moving.\u00a0 The characters may talk over each other.<\/p>\n
In action, you have action, dolly and pan, cut-on-action, dolly and pan, cut-on-action, dolly and pan.\u00a0 You get foreground, rack focus to background.\u00a0 You get foreground-background two shots.\u00a0 You get characters running up to the camera and looking past it.<\/p>\n
You get many things no director does any more.\u00a0 And it\u2019s a shame.<\/p>\n
There some very Spielberg shots in The Rock, when Michael Bay was still young and he relied more on his more-experienced D.P., who happened to also D.P. Jurassic World \u2013 John Schwartzman. Nowadays, Michael Bay does three things:\u00a0 long elaborate C.G. shots, spinning camera shots, and lots and lots of shorts shots with no panning.\u00a0 I can\u2019t tell exactly John Schwartzman\u2019s influence on the movie, except to say it looked good?<\/p>\n
Again, the whole movie just felt like coverage, with an epic scale.\u00a0 At least the scale was spot on.\u00a0 Lots of long shots juxtaposing massive animals with tiny humans.\u00a0 Well done.\u00a0 If you didn\u2019t hook me with Spielberg-isms, you did well on the grandeur.\u00a0 And the helicopter shots.\u00a0 I loved every one of them \u2013 and there were lots!<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A Commentary as The Plot Unfolds<\/p>\n
So we follow the story of an over-worked female park manager who hires an assistant to watch her nephews who have flown all the way out to Costa Rica to spend two days with HER.\u00a0 When her sister (the boys\u2019 mom) finds out, she cries.\u00a0 She doesn\u2019t get angry, she cries that their aunt won\u2019t even set aside time for the kids.\u00a0 So the kids run away from the assistant and explore the park themselves.<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, a non-chalant boy scout is demonstrating how he had trained a pack of velociraptors to mildly respond to his command \u2013 for the first time (well I assume so, because a co-worker says \u201cYou finally did it!\u201d).\u00a0 A military dude watches this demonstration and tells him basically \u201cTell me how to do it, so we can train them as bunker busters\u201d.\u00a0 Side note\u2014this was one of my subplots for my own take on Jurassic Park, so I was pleased that they included it, but displeased that there was no tact to it at all!\u00a0 He straight out said \u201cTell me how to do it, join me, or we\u2019re doing it on our without you.\u201d<\/p>\n
So the kids run off to an orb ride, where there\u2019s a glass sphere that rolls about Jurassic World in herbivore expanse.<\/p>\n
The boy scout\u2013\u2013okay, he\u2019s not a boy scout, but he carries himself like a troop leader, with a voice like he\u2019s barely out of high school\u2013\u2013is brought in to assess the new dinosaur Indomitus Rex \u2013 who we haven\u2019t seen yet.\u00a0 He realizes there\u2019s a large scratch on the wall, like it was trying to climb out.\u00a0 They ask command where is the dinosaur.\u00a0 The computer indicates it\u2019s not inside!\u00a0 So they assume it\u2019s left the cage!\u00a0 The girl gets in a car, and heads to the command center.\u00a0 She phones them on the way and tells them to turn on the tracker on the Indomitus Rex.\u00a0 Herein is annoying plot-hole number one.\u00a0 Why would she leave the compound if she thinks the Indomitus Rex is out and about.\u00a0 Wouldn\u2019t she call from within the building?\u00a0 And why don\u2019t they have the tracker at the console that indicated the dinosaur was not in its cage?<\/p>\n
Next, our boy scout and two or three workers enter the cage to inspect the scratches.\u00a0 Annoying plot-hole number 2.\u00a0 Why is he wasting his god-damn time inside the cage when the god-damned monster is out and about?!!\u00a0 That\u2019s not a hero to me!\u00a0 That\u2019s an idiot.\u00a0 Besides the fact, he\u2019s casually strolling about as if there\u2019s not rush to be anywhere.<\/p>\n
When the girl gets the command center to turn on the tracker, the tracker indicates that the dinosaur is actually in cage.\u00a0 She has enough time to call our boy scout but only moment before the dinosaur rears its face.\u00a0 They start running away, and the dinosaur chases after them.\u00a0 All sense of scale and speed is lost because it appears that the dinosaur needs some time to catch up to them, even though they\u2019re only about 50 feet away.\u00a0 So he grabs one of the workers with his arms.\u00a0 Not stunted t-rex arms, but long human-like arms with dino claws.<\/p>\n
One of the remaining workers gets to the gate, and begins to open it up for himself.\u00a0 Never mind that there is a giant dinosaur he would let into the park as he runs out the gate without shutting it.\u00a0 He sort of turns back to shut it or maybe the boy scout does it after he runs out, but the dinosaur gets to the door and shoves it open.\u00a0 Now it\u2019s genuinely loose.<\/p>\n
Now is an allusion to J1.\u00a0 The worker who ran out first hides behind a car, and the dinosaur slowly creeps around to assess them car and him.\u00a0 Meanwhile the boy scout cuts the oil line of the car he\u2019s hiding under and douses himself in oil.\u00a0 It calls to mind that earlier the girl made fun of him for smelling saying the Indomitus Rex has good smell. So after the dino eats the worker, he approaches the truck that the boy scout is hiding under, sniffs about and moves on.\u00a0 I guess you can argue, he couldn\u2019t see him under the truck, and he couldn\u2019t smell him so he moved.\u00a0 But when I saw the movie first, I thought he was blind like the t-rex and needed smell to guide him.\u00a0 I think I\u2019m wrong.<\/p>\n
So then, he disappears into the park; the northern region, far from the populated areas.\u00a0 Except that the rolling glass balls are free to roam in that area.<\/p>\n
They all meet at the command center and the boy scout gets mad: how can you not know it\u2019s in the pen?\u00a0 \u201cWe use thermal sensors to detect where it is.\u201d (Oh yeah, THAT\u2019S a great idea!)\u00a0 We mixed its genes with other reptiles and amphibians; it must have learned how to chamoflauge its heat signature.\u00a0 (Oh yeah! THAT SOUND FEASIBLE!).\u00a0 \u201cWell that thing is really smart then.\u00a0 It left those claw marks to make us THINK that it had escaped, so we would open the gates and let it escape.\u201d\u00a0 (Well, I don\u2019t think that the dinosaur had that in mind \u2013 in fact, it is a very unlikely plan \u2013 so NO.\u00a0 I\u2019m not on board with that.)<\/p>\n
Now what do we do?<\/p>\n
We have staff trained to handle loose dinosaurs.\u00a0 We\u2019re smarter than Jurassic Park.\u00a0 Our boys will go to work.
\nYou\u2019re going to kill it?<\/p>\n
God no.\u00a0 That\u2019s a multi-million dollar asset.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to tranquilize it.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s a bad idea.\u00a0 You beefed up this dinosaur, you won\u2019t tell me what\u2019s its capable of, and this girl doesn\u2019t even know!\u00a0 You\u2019re sending those men to their deaths.<\/p>\n
They\u2019ll be fine.<\/p>\n
Ok. I guess so. I\u2019ll stick around here, and watch.<\/p>\n
Sure enough, they get out there, find out it\u2019s killing for sport, and that its tracking device has been clawed out! And while they\u2019re look at the tracking device, the dinosaur attacks and kills them all.\u00a0 No one gets a good shot off, and when they do, it\u2019s not strong enough.<\/p>\n
See?\u00a0 Your men are gone.\u00a0 You have evacuate this island.<\/p>\n
No.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just move everyone inside.\u00a0 We\u2019d never re-open if we evacuated.<\/p>\n
But people are going to die. (You should have told them \u201cYou\u2019ll never re-open if people die! And they already have!\u201d\u00a0 I keep waiting for the hero to take charge.)<\/p>\n
No.\u00a0 We\u2019ll find it in time.<\/p>\n
To which I\u2019m wondering how?\u00a0 It\u2019s got no tracker.\u00a0 Your combat men are dead.\u00a0 Aren\u2019t you worried about your nephews?\u00a0 Don\u2019t you know about Jurassic Park?<\/p>\n
Moving on.\u00a0 Now the boys in their glass ball find an opened door in the gate.\u00a0 \u201cThey\u2019re telling us to head back. Ride\u2019s closed.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cCome on, Let\u2019s live a little.\u00a0 Screw the rules.\u00a0 We\u2019re VIP.\u201d\u00a0 (Of course.)<\/p>\n
Sure enough, they run into the Indomitus Rex.\u00a0 Pretty awesome scene.\u00a0 They barely survive.<\/p>\n
The glass ball had a tracker, which the Aunt begs the Boy Scout follow \u2013 in his gas jeep.\u00a0 But the boys have moved on \u2013 the tracks indicate they escaped.\u00a0 The Aunt tries to be all rough and tumble, but comically comes off like a model (at least they\u2019re self-aware).\u00a0 I\u2019m later told she went through the entire movie in high heels.\u00a0 And she was wearing white.\u00a0 As for our boy scout.\u00a0 He\u2019s not scared.\u00a0 A little frumpy.\u00a0 And completely passionless.\u00a0 They sort of have chemistry, but I don\u2019t see her or her character being interested in this guy because he doesn\u2019t seem very commanding.\u00a0 In fact, I\u2019m surprised he\u2019s still alive right now, considering the only weapon he has is a field rifle.\u00a0 Maybe a handful of shots?<\/p>\n
So here I am interested in which characters?<\/p>\n
The boy scout who has to be told to take action.\u00a0 Who wanders around in an \u201cempty\u201d cage as a killer dinosaur is on the loose.<\/p>\n
The female lead who pawned her nephews on some assistant (nanny) she hired for that one day?\u00a0 Who is a perfectionist and a bitch about it.\u00a0 Who cannot emote the entire movie: joy, sorrow, or aggression.<\/p>\n
The CEO\/financial investor who was actually pretty cool and can-do; who is in town for the day (to see the Indomitus Rex), but is making all the bad calls?<\/p>\n
The army guy who wants to train velociraptors but has the presence of Dan Akroyd?<\/p>\n
Or the boys?\u00a0 The boys.\u00a0 Who just learned that their parents are getting divorced, whose Aunt abandoned them.\u00a0 One of which is an angsty teenager; the other a know-it-all (or know-all-the-dinosaurs-all) upset with his parents\u2019 break-up.<\/p>\n
Then, the guys in charge load a gun to a helicopter and go chase after it.\u00a0 There\u2019s only two helicopter pilots on the island, and the one who flew in is missing \u2013 probably lost in the ride closures.\u00a0 So the investor\/CEO is the pilot.<\/p>\n
They find it in the park, but it gets into an atrium, and lets the flying dinosaurs free.\u00a0 They flood out of the area, crashing into the helicopter on accident, sending it crashing to the ground where it explodes.\u00a0 Then for some reason, they continue on to the park and attack guests!!\u00a0 Pretty awesome.\u00a0 But something about crowd scenes lacked Spielberg\u2019s style.\u00a0 It felt very TV.\u00a0 Almost just plain coverage.<\/p>\n
So the movie moves along through predictable outcomes (the Indomitus Rex always wins) until its logical conclusion, which actually, I really appreciated.\u00a0 The ending was surprisingly similar to the original Jurassic Park ending (touche!) with enough twists on it to keep it fresh.<\/p>\n